Teacher Jokes and Humor
We appreciate clean, family friendly humor. Have you heard something that tickled your funny bone? Send it along to us at Jokes@TexasTeachers.org.
The methods different departments use to grade exams:
- Department of Statistics:
- All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve.
- Department of Psychology:
- Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind.
- Department of History:
- All students get the same grade they got last year.
- Department of Philosophy:
- What is a grade?
- Law School:
- Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A.
- Department of Logic:
- If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A; else the student will not receive an A.
- Department of Computer Science:
- Random number generator determines grade.
- Music Department:
- Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note (+ and - would be sharp and flat respectively).
You Might Be a Teacher If...
- you impulsively correct total stranger's grammatical errors.
- you refer to adults as "boys and girls."
- you encourage your spouse by telling them they are a "good helper."
- you can eat a multi-course meal in under twenty-five minutes.
- you've trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day: lunch and prep period
- you know hundreds of good reasons for being late.
- you can't pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items.
- you find true beauty in a can full of perfectly sharpened pencils.